Does this chair make my butt look big?

"I've gained eight pounds since last November", I moaned, as I pinched the miniature "love handle" making itself comfortable around my waist. "At this rate I'll gain 24 pounds by year's end."

I hadn't stepped on a scale since I don't know when, so I wasn't completely surprised to see the bar continue its slide to the right as I gently nudged it with my finger. The bar hovered at one hundred and sixty-five pounds and I jumped off the platform before it could change its mind. It appeared that my recent retirement from the friendly skies, combined with my husband's excellent cooking and my current job sitting at a computer for eight hours a day had taken its toll. This system overhall wasn't coming a moment too soon.

The excess weight had disguised itself well since Í am far from vertically challenged. I've always had "skater's thighs", except now there was an extra layer of "textured" insulation blocking the winter's chill. The slight thickening at the waistline would have been cause for concern were it not for the happy fact that I always lose weight there before anywhere else.

I contemplated my plan of attack as I methodically moved from one piece of exercise equipment to the next during my evening at our local "Y". This is serious business but with a little modification of diet, accelerated workouts and support from my family and friends, my chair won't recognize me in six month's time.